I do believe this past six months has taught all of us to do a double-take on what is important and how we prioritize our choices around “being.” With our young children, simply being present and showing up is necessary. Depending on a child’s temperament, it can influence how they see you. Are you dependable? Are you trustworthy? Do you value their time with you or are you distracted? Believe me, they notice.
In being with your children, there will be times that you simply need to just be close by, observing their play as they create. Other moments may need your input and certainly need your hands on investment as you create playful interactions together. Be pro-active. If your children are struggling, observe and ask why. The earlier you uncover roadblocks to learning, the better off your children will be as they move forward. Perhaps it speech, maybe it’s physically needing support. Ask your children’s teachers and get recommendations for support. Whatever it is, you have a duty to invest the energy into figuring it out and moving your children forward in the best way you can.
The Story: Being Present and Recieving the Gift
When my older daughter was four, her preschool class was planning a Mother’s Day Tea. I was excited to go to my first Tea Party at school, but my daughter had other thoughts about the day. When I told her it was time to get dressed for school, she protested. She did not want to go and I decided it was not going to be a good experience for either of us to go, so I called the school and told them we were taking the day off. Had this been another “regular” day, we certainly would have packed up and gone to school, but in reality, I was being a bit selfish because I didn’t want a memory of my first school Tea Party to be one filled with tears.
Once I backed off and told her we would stay home together for the morning, her tears immediately dried up and she shared a secret with me. She had been planning in her mind, my very own personal tea party. Be still my heart!
She led me to the kitchen and we made peanut butter finger sandwiches and lemonade. We picked flowers from the back yard and decorated the dining room table. She was quite specific that she wanted to use the fine china, and carefully she set the plates, cups and saucers at our places at the table.
Having prepared the table, she announced it was time to get ourselves ready and oh, what fun we had going through my closet. She picked out her grown up outfit, picked out my dress, we put on make-up together and brushed each other’s hair.
I must say, the celebration at the table and the actual Tea Party, took about five minutes but the true celebration of her wanting to have this morning together was the true gift. To this day, it is my favorite memory of Mother’s Day. I am forever grateful that I did not miss it. I am grateful I was able to be present and just be-with her. You never know by being present, being playful and being accepting what magical gift awaits you.
Here’s wishing you a Happy Mother’s Day, everyday.
See you tomorrow.